Top tips from Simone Milasas.
1. Don’t quit.
I would say number one is don’t quit, like enjoy your choices. Don’t quit. Keep choosing no matter who says anything around you.
2. I’m going to ask what are you aware of?
Number two is I’m going to ask what are you aware of? Because you are aware of so much more than you’re willing to acknowledge? So with something that you got when you go to say, Oh, I don’t know, stop, what am I aware of in regards to this? What am I aware of?
3. Stop judging you and your business or you in business.
I would I would suggest is stop judging you and your business or you in business. Most people have a judgment about them their business, or the judgment of them in business without enjoying it lacks.
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
choose, people, money, business, good, debra, vilification, put, talking, today, bali, learned, world, life, choice, tools, interesting, question, listen, grateful
Debra Chantry-Taylor 00:00
Welcome to another episode of Better Business Better Life. I’m your host, Debra Chantry-Taylor.
Simone Milasas 00:12
If anyone at home listening to this or watching this, it’s like if you have, if you go you’ve got a problem, right? And so most people would do this hunched in thing, and they’re like, ah, you know, or their hands on their head, and they’re like, Oh, I’ve got a money problem. I’ve got this and everything. So you talk about that, right? Now, I want you to think about the same thing and put your hands up in the air. Like, say you’ve got a money problem. I wrote Joy business is the first book I wrote. And I wrote that because I had this conversation with Gary Douglas, who’s the founder of access, and I was talking about a choice that somebody made. And I said to me, it doesn’t make sense. Why would somebody make this choice? And he said, What are you talking about? And I went, Well, this has to do with business and business is joyful. And that’s not a joyful choice, you know, and he looked at me and he went, What are you talking about? And I went, I went business is joyful, anyway, smiling. It’s not. And I went, Yes, it is. This was honestly this moment that I was like, I have no idea what you’re talking about. He said, Simone, most people don’t do business for the joy of it. You know, one of those those moments in life that you have your hands on your hips and your head, Cox, and you’re like, seriously, what are they doing? Or, you know, and so he looked at me and laughed, and he said, I said, you need to do some seminars on this and start talking about it. And so I did.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 01:40
And today, I am joined by Simone Milasas, who is really fascinating. She is an author of a number of different books. She’s a facilitator of anxious consciousness. And she’s also a multiple business owner, and all varying different types of businesses as well. So I’m very much looking forward to hearing how she got to where she is today. Welcome to the show, Simone.
Simone Milasas 01:58
Thank you, Debra, thank you for having me here.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 02:00
No absolute pleasure. So I got sent a very beautiful list of the things that you have achieved in your life, I wonder if you might share your journey with the listeners and tell us who you are, and how you got to be where you are today.
Simone Milasas 02:12
You know, I always think it’s interesting when when, when a host says you talk about you, because when someone reads my bio, I’m like, Wow, that’s quite extensive. You know, and, and then when you tell your own story, it’s a little different, because you’re just choosing you. And I would say, from day one, I’d say from like, when I was about 15 years of age, is I think there was a that’s when I started to change the trajectory of how I was looking at life, because I was very much looking around and seeing, you know, a lot of people are choosing trauma and drama, or just it seemed to be like, everything was there was so many problems and all of that, and I went, This can’t be yet because I’ve always really, I fell in love with our planet. Like I think since day one, I think the earth is amazing. And nature, etc. I was like, there has to be something different. There has to be something greater. So I think about that age, I made the demands of myself that I would find out what else was possible, like what else was available, not just to do what everybody else was doing, and not, but not to choose against what everyone else was choosing. It’s sort of like that you do you I do me energy. And so I proceeded to I went overseas after I left school, told everyone I was going for six months. And I ended up staying for three years, you know, I worked in and did a billion different random jobs, came home and everyone sort of, you know, patted me on the back and said, Well, you’ve got that out of your system. Now, you know, now you can settle down and I was like, Are you kidding me? And I was like, this is just the beginning, you know. And so again, I think my whole life, Debra, a lot of choices I’ve made, they haven’t landed well in other people’s worlds. Like I think I’ve made people uncomfortable for not defining what I wanted to choose Next, but exploring what I desired to choose next. So at that moment, too, I remember thinking, no one’s gonna hear this, if I say I just want to go back overseas, or I want to create something different, you know, they’re going to, you know, think that I’m not doing the quote unquote, right thing. And I would say, my whole life, I definitely had projections and a lot of a lot of energetic projections to I think people will verbally say something to you. But I think sometimes what sort of holds you back as well is all the energetic stuff that’s projected that you have, you know, you can’t settle down. It’s like, I mean I’ve ever had one guy said to me, You do realize how bad your resume looks right? You know, because I was just doing so many different things. But for me, I would do something and go, Well, I’m done. I learned everything I could learn here. You know, I’m not staying in this job. It’s like I’m bored. I want to move on. But it didn’t quote unquote, look good on my resume. You can’t make up your mind like all these different points of view. But somewhere in my Well, Debra, I knew that I was here to do and be something different. So I kept moving forward, and I kept doing different jobs. And I kept traveling. And I kept just sort of, I guess waking up in the morning and asking where the next adventure is, even though like I said, I even had good friends of mine say, When are you going to get a real job? I was like, wow, what do you mean a real job, like, You guys seem really unhappy? Is that what I meant to choose? You know, so I was in London, actually. And I was really poor. And living in one of those houses with way too many people, you know. So to get some space, what I used to do is get on one of those big, you know, double decker buses, hopefully set up the front, I love sitting up the front on the top. And I would just write, and I remember writing this whole piece on vulnerability, and, you know, what would it take to be vulnerable in the world and with each other, because I noticed when people would meet each other, it was like, they’d put these barriers up. And I was like, you know, when kids little little, like, really little kids see each other, and they’re just like you want to play, they don’t care how much money you’ve got, in your bank account, what your name is, what your culture is, where you’re from anything. They’re like, Would you like to play? And that was a world that I was asking, what would it take to create that. So I wrote this whole piece on vulnerability. And I wrote the outline of an idea I had, through all the travels, and all the people that I met to start a business, and it was called good vibes for you, that had merchandise like T shirts, stickers, magnets, etc, with sayings on them, that I was hopefully designed to inspire people just to, to wake up and know that there doesn’t have to be a problem, there can be something different. available, you know, so and I had some, you know, Gandhi quotes and things like that, but I had a lot of my designs were literally from people I’ve met and conversations I had, and I’d be like that, and I would write it down, you know, like, there was one Israeli guy. And I met him in Nepal. And I remember he said to me, you know, I was going on about something. And he said, You’re crazy. He said, Just relax. And he said, Look, the way I look at this is if you feel good, you are good. If you feel bad, change it. I was like, That’s brilliant. So that was one of my best selling T shirts. And I got it from this Israeli guy I made in a hostel. So I created this business called good vibes for you. Um, and it grew. And it was, you know, it was a roller coaster ride. And there was so many elements to it that I, you know, had to institute and in deal with everything, it was like being thrown in at the deep end of a pool, and only just learning how to swim. And I learned so much about business, from that, and from totally being in question. But what also showed up was, I used to do lots of music festivals and mind, body and spirit festivals and everything. And through that, I met Gary Douglas, who is the founder of Access Consciousness. And when I spoke to him one day, I was like, Oh, my goodness, this guy’s everything that I want to create, like, it was the whole concept that I had, you know, but for me, it was like putting on a t shirt and maybe grabbing people by the shoulders and saying, shaking them and saying, Don’t you get it, there’s got to be something different, you know? Yeah. And when I went and listened to him talk, I was like, Oh, that’s pretty easy. You’ve got these questions and tools and processes that create that change. So, you know, me being me, I found myself within six months, I was in Houston, Texas, attending a facilitators class. And, and, you know, I’ve been working with access now for 22 years. So I’ve been working with access for 22 years, I’m so grateful. And I have me being me. Also, I have lots of other investments and businesses that I’ve entered into as well. So this is for me, I think it you know, I know a lot of people would look at this as being quite successful and successful beyond what a lot of people choose. And for me, it’s also just the beginning. But it’s also not about the money. I’ve learned to have money. I’ve learned to receive money. I’ve learned to enjoy money, because I’ve definitely gone through stages where I didn’t. And I’m always like asking what else is possible for me to be in the world today?
Debra Chantry-Taylor 09:25
Beautiful. It is interesting, isn’t it? Because we do get these people in our lives who have a desire to make you normal. Even if it makes you desperate and happy my parents were put one of those and it was really difficult because they had this expectation of what normal was and I looked at their life and thought, but you’re never happy. So how does that why would want to be normal?
Simone Milasas 09:47
We know I know. I remember my parents saying to me when I came back from overseas. Okay, so now it’s time to settle down and get a good safe job, you know, and I was being I was being petulant little rat of a child as well. And I’m ever putting my hands on my hips and going I’d rather stick needles in my eyes and get a good safe job. You know, I had to deal with resistance, not just choice, you know, but I used to get it like they both came from, you know, World War Two in, you know, my dad, my dad escaped from Lithuania, my mother was on, you know, one of those boats that came from Britain that you pay 10 pounds. So for them, that was important to get a good safe job. But for me, I was like, I need to explore the world, I need to explore me. So and I’m really grateful because my father was always he came to that place of like, Simone, this is your life, you’ve got to choose it. I’ll be here for you. But you’ve got to choose it. So he was never really trying to make me normal. He wanted me to be safe, but not necessarily normal.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 10:44
Now, thank goodness for that. It was interesting. We had a chat before we came on the podcast, you know, you I asked about your venture into the antiques world, which we’ll cover off in a second. And you said, you know, you asked yourself the question, what’s the worst that can happen? That was one of the things my father actually taught me was to ask that question, because it’s such an eye opener in terms of most of the time, the worst that can happen is really not that bad, is it?
Simone Milasas 11:08
No, no. And it’s a tool I use for a lot in business, too. Because a lot of the times people will try and work out those pros and cons. I’m not a pros and cons goal at all. I’m like, is this gonna work? You know, asking a question and go to the other spectrum, like you said, What’s the worst thing that’s going to happen? You know, and it’s like, if you can handle that, go for it?
Debra Chantry-Taylor 11:27
Yeah, I’m very grateful for my father for teaching me that. Okay, so let’s have a little bit of an exploration into some of these businesses. So they got the good vibes for you thing that sort of took off. And then the one that was sort of most interesting to me in terms of your bio, was this deciding to start an antique store in the middle of COVID? Why on earth? Would you do that?
Simone Milasas 11:49
Well, good question. And, yeah, you know, I live in a place in the Sunshine Coast, called Phrygian. Beach, and we have this village up the road, and it’s so beautiful. And it’s just, it’s just the way it’s set up is, for me, it’s so conducive to someone going there and shopping and restaurants, etc. It’s just, it’s different. And hardly ever does spaces show up. And this beautiful space showed up. And it was during COVID. It was July. It was around June, July 2020. And so we didn’t know what was going on. Like I thought all of that was going to, you know, stop in four weeks or something. And it just kept going. And it was like, Okay, what do we do now? So this space became available, and you know, not knowing if you’re going into lockdown, etc, or anything, I was like, What do I do? I mean, Queensland you couldn’t get in or out, like for months. So I sat outside on this chair, and I looked at the space. And one of the things I would do, too, is sort of like tap into the choice I have available, the future that is available, not from conclusion. And I think that’s a really big thing to look at, like stop concluding what you think it should be and allow it to show up the way it desires to be. And I went, we have so many we have so many beautiful antiques, we have two shops in Brisbane, we have this massive warehouse that’s filled. So it wasn’t like, Oh, where am I going to get that form? Easy, you know, for that part was like a no brainer. And I looked at it and went Okay, so what’s the worst thing that could happen? And hearing my father who was an accountant, I’m like, Well, it’s a tax deduction. Okay, I can handle that. And so we did it. And it’s still there today. So looking beautiful as ever, and for antiques and possibilities, because they’re
Debra Chantry-Taylor 13:34
Excellent. Now I want to explore a little bit about the writing that you’ve done, because you’ve talked about being on that double decker bus and writing back in the early days. But since then, you’ve written a number of different books, I want you to we want to share a bit about the books that you’ve written and why.
Simone Milasas 13:48
Yeah, I look, I wrote Joy business is the first book I wrote. And I wrote that because I had this conversation with Gary Douglas, who’s the founder of access, and I was talking about a choice that somebody made. And I said to me, it doesn’t make sense. Why would somebody make this choice? And he said, What are you talking about? And I went, Well, this has to do with business and business is joyful. And that’s not a joyful choice, you know, and he looked at me and he went, What are you talking about? And I went, I went business is joyful, anyway, smiling. It’s not and I went, Yes, it is. This was honestly this moment that I was like, I have no idea what you’re talking about. He said, Simone, most people don’t do business for the joy of it. You know, one of those those moments in life that you have your hands on your hips in your head Cox in your life, seriously, what do they do? You know? And so he looked at me and laughed, and he said, I said, you need to do some seminars on this and start talking about it. And so I did. And I started doing these seminars using the Access Consciousness tools and just different things that I chosen and how the tools had worked like because I didn’t have this right. But what I do have is the willingness to choose and acknowledge when I’m choosing something that’s limiting me You know, so then I’ll be like, oh, let’s change this. So I was talking about this. And so many people like to be honest, I was on stage doing these seminars, thinking, I’d rather be creating business than talking about it. So I was almost going to stop. When I had people come up to me and the look on their face and their world. I went, Oh, these people, it’s changing their lives. And I, and I went, That’s matching the energy of what I’d like to create in the world. So I could perceive the gratitude and how it was changing people’s lives and their businesses. So then I went, Okay, let’s put this into a book. So I did. And I think it’s translated into like, 16 or 17 languages now, too, and on Audible on all these different languages as well. So Joy business, and then the second book I wrote, is called getting out of debt joyfully. And that is because I, too, have a story. I mean, people meet me and think, Oh, she’s always had money, or she’s always had no, I haven’t. It’s like, you know, I, I did that thing of resisting money avoiding it? You know, just how can I live life with no money was basically it was almost like my motto. I’m not saying to do that. But that was like my motto. And I, the moment I went, you know, I need to look at this. Because somewhere, I thought some someone’s going to knock on my door and said, you know, all those money problems you’ve had, don’t worry, we’re going to take them all away. And it doesn’t happen. It didn’t happen, I realized that I had to choose something different. And what I was choosing wasn’t working. So I needed to choose something different. So again, I like grabbed hold of the access tools and started using them. And I didn’t like it. It wasn’t comfortable. It was extremely uncomfortable. And I started using these tools and just implementing different things, which was almost like flipping my script, like how I’d been functioning, just flip it totally. And like I said, I wasn’t, it wasn’t comfortable. It was uncomfortable. But I set myself this target for three months to just change the way I was looking at my financial reality. And I realized I was $187,000 in debt, and rent, okay, oh, my goodness. What am I gonna do with this, you know, and after three months, I wasn’t out of debt. But I noticed the energy around money had changed for me. And so I went, Okay, I like that, that matches the energy. And then even that took me about two years to get out of debt, and to have more money. And the day that I realized I had money, and I wasn’t in debt. Debra, I remember coming home and looking at all of my things and everything and looking at my computer and my bank accounts and all that. And I went, I have money. And I was sitting in my office, and I went, huh, I went, Wow, this is not very interesting. This is a bit boring. I was like, where’s the you know, someone the marching band coming in and being like, Yay, you did it, you know, the fireworks and all of that. And I was like, Okay, this is a different energy. And then two weeks later, I realized I had created debt again. And I was smart enough to go what do I love about creating debt. And I realized, Debra, I knew it, I knew the energy of that I knew what it was like to be stressing and be anxious about how I was going to pay the rent, or how I was going to move a project forward or something like that, where am I going to get the money from because I was good at getting money. I was good at you know, getting loans or whatever and creating it. I was good at creating money. I was just spending a lot you know, so I realized I was more comfortable having no money. And I went, wow, you know what, I’m gonna make the demand of myself that I find out what is this like to actually have money, and never be stressed out about money again. So that’s what I asked for. And I would say from then until now, I have created more money, like more wealth, more success, as I mean to say this reality would define it. And I’m also finding out how much money is great. Love it, enjoy it, absolutely do love it and enjoy it. But wow, there is so much greater things available, but money just makes your life easier. So stop avoiding it. But it’s like God, there’s just there’s so much out there and so much available. So that was my second book. Third one. I wrote with my ex, we were together at the time. And it’s called relationship. Are you sure you want one? It’s a question. And we actually split the relationship up as we were in the US and we had all this media and TV and everything. And our PR agent had a little mini heart attack and we were like don’t worry about it because that’s that’s part of this book. We want people to be in question and not choose to be in relationship based on necessity. Relationships should be a choice. So
Debra Chantry-Taylor 19:52
Wow, gosh, let’s have some real synergies there. I actually read if you know my background, but I actually lost a huge amount of money in a business and spinning any money at about 340k. It’s been many years kind of paying it off. But it taught me so many lessons. And I think that what I’ve realized also is that we, we put so much emphasis on certain things that actually when you don’t have them, you realize they’re not that important. And it just completely changed our mindset, don’t we? Well, I love money. And I’m very fortunate now to have money and living a lovely life. But it’s, yeah, it made me sort of question a lot of things about what really made me happy, what was I truly grateful for? And I think gratitude became a really huge part for me in terms of looking for the gratitude in every day. And yeah, being. I don’t I don’t think I actually in the beginning, it was very stressful. In the end, I think I kind of learned that actually. Life was short, make it what you can do what you can and be grateful for what you can do each day.
Simone Milasas 20:44
Yeah, I totally agree. It’s like and, you know, I think some of those times in life, Debra, when things like that show up and people go, Oh, my God, that’s terrible. No, it’s not. It’s every single thing that has shown up for me that people would go, Oh, that’s terrible. Or, you know, that was bad or whatever. I’m like, No, it’s not it was such a gift. It was such a gift. I’ve gained so much awareness.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 21:09
The most of the things that you learn, I think I mean, I just always I always look back on everything. And I will say, you know, failure is not a negative word. It’s like it’s only really a negative word. If you don’t learn anything from it, and you live in that victim mentality of, you know, why did this happen? To me? I look at everything kind of go. Okay, that was interesting. I learned that from that. Okay, great. Let’s move on. Yeah. Well,
Simone Milasas 21:29
You know, the business I mentioned before, which is no longer in existence, good vibes for you. But that one of the T shirts I had, and it said, Imagine what you would do if you knew you couldn’t fail. And that’s what I live by. Yeah.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 21:41
Yeah. Yeah. Soldiers. Yeah. Okay. So one of the things that you talk about is about leadership, right, and telling leadership on its head. Can we explore that a wee bit? Because? Yeah, is what the question was, What if everything you’ve been taught about leadership is a lie?
Simone Milasas 21:58
Yeah, well, I think, for me, okay. So here’s the basis for me, is, I think a leader knows where they’re going. And a leader is not looking for someone to validate them, a leader is not looking for followers, a leader knows where they’re going, and they will head in that direction, even if they are totally alone. And I think that’s the basis of where it starts. So in for me, it’s like really committing to your life, committing to your life is committing to everything you’re choosing, whether it’s you know, your body, money, relationships, business, family, all of it, it’s like really being committed to what works for you, like you got to choose for you, you have to enjoy your choices. And I think that’s the true leadership. From that if you implement that in business, then you’re not looking for other people around you to validate you, you’re not looking for the followers, you’re also willing, and I think this is a really big piece to, you’re willing to hear everybody else, because you’re not expecting them just to ally and agree with you. And there was a businessman in Australia, Dick Smith, and I always remember reading this interview many years ago. And someone asked him, How did you become so successful? And he said, I surrounded myself by capable, capable people, and I listened. And for me, that is such a true leader, because you’re not, you’re not looking for everyone to give you a pause as you walk in. What do you know? What do you know? What do you know? What do you know? What do you know? Then you can gather all of that and choose that you know where you’re heading.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 23:29
I think one of the joys of actually with a podcast I love I don’t know if my listeners enjoy it, but I certainly enjoyed meeting some amazing people and always learning every single time there’s something you can take on which I think is fantastic. Yeah. So what if though, so, I mean, we touched on this briefly, but there’s always people who are prepared to kind of tear you down people who are prepared to kind of knock you make once I think they almost want to make you feel bad about yourself. How do you cope with that?
Simone Milasas 23:57
Yeah, the vilification. Yeah. And before we started, I was saying to you know, with business, you can look at the pragmatics, you can look at how to set it up and you know, how you’re going to your clients and your money flow and, and all that sort of thing. But you do have to look at the vilification part. And you know, I mentioned Prejean beach village, just before it’s a small village. And so is there competition there? Sure. And there’s a lady who just opened up a shop here who sells jewelry now, we also sell jewelry, and there’s another place that sells jewelry, and I went in introduced myself and I just was like, how do I make this woman feel comfortable because I said, Hey, you’re going to do really well here. We do well with our jewelry too. And for me, it’s like engaging with others and having that place where you can build people up and empower them and not having to do competition or vilification in order to cut somebody down. And I’ve had my fair share of vilification and one of them was actually a main one was from my book getting out of debt joyfully, you know, someone had put out there that was so strange he put out there that I was like snake oil and everything in the book was lies and blah, blah, blah. And you know, and for some reason the media just caught on to it in Australia, and I was in Iraq. And I was in Italy, because it had been going on all day here. And my PR agent was like, freaking out. And I was like, so I started freaking out, because she was freaking out. And then I went, hang on, just let me get a coffee and have a shower. And I’ll call you back, you know? And then it caught her. And I say, Okay, tell me what’s going on. And she told me, she said, the media wouldn’t do interviews with you, from everywhere, even from the UK, they picked it up, and I went, Okay, I’ll do it. And she said, they’re going to vilify you and I went, but nobody can vilify me. Unless they choose to let them vilify me, I know, what I’m choosing is true and real for me. I know, every story I put in that book, every tool I put in that book worked for me, and that was my life. If somebody wants to vilify that, okay, someone wants to judge it, okay. But I’m being true to me. And it’s not an easy energy to deal with, like, over the, you know, the years and even just recently, there’s people on social media that have been saying, you know, stuff about me, and I was known because people reach out to me and go, Hi, I just want to tell you how grateful I am for you, you know, you changed my life, and blah, blah, and I go. But it’s so cool to see how many people have had my back, you know, you’ll have 1000 people who send you gratitude and one person who’s trying to tear you down. And what I really implore, if you’re listening to this, and this is showing up in your life, please. Like listen to the 1000 people and even that receive that is just, you know, this interesting point of view receive it, but that one person is trying to pull you down. It’s like, what if you just what if you didn’t care about it? What if that didn’t have to exist? So and it really is like a muscle? Because you want to make that true and real. Like I remember going through moments where I was trying to understand why would someone be that mean and that cruel. But it’s not about understanding, it’s about allowing them to have their choice, because they do get to have their choice, that’s theirs. But I also had to have my choice, and you don’t have to buy that as true and real. And one of the great tool that a friend of mine gave me was one day there was these three women who I thought were my friends. And I started hearing all this stuff that was saying about me. And I rang Gary, because I was worldwide coordinator of access for 18 years, and I ran Gary and I said, Hey, I don’t know if I can do this job anymore. And he said, Okay, tell me what’s going on. I said, I can’t handle the judgments. Anyway, okay, tell me what’s going on. So I told him, and he said, Okay, here’s what I want you to do. He said, I want you to put your attention on their lives, and what they’ve chosen, okay? Not from judgment, just from the awareness what they’re choosing. Now, I want you to put your attention on your life and what you’re choosing and what you’ve chosen. I said, Okay. And he said, are they judging you? Or are they judging what they have not chosen and might never choose? They went, Hmm, okay. And I’ll never forget that because it helps me so much. Along the way to look at judgment is not real. And so many people will project something at you and cast judgment at you, because you make them feel uncomfortable, or the times from what you’re choosing. And Brene Brown said it in a TED talk she did to you know, she was saying if you’re on stage, and she used that metaphorically, but I am on stage, but if you if you’re on stage, it’s not if people will judge you, they will judge you how are you going to handle it? And for me, that’s that’s the that’s the leadership thing too. It’s like how are you going to handle it? What are you going to choose how you’re going to deal with that vilification? You know, someone pushes you over, you stumble and fall, what are you going to choose next? Get up, brush it, brush your knees off and be like, Okay, what’s so funny about this? I’m not laughing about it and move on, you know?
Debra Chantry-Taylor 29:04
Excellent. I am sitting here listening. I just love this. But there must be days when you also waver, right? When you have moments of either no doubt, self doubt. Is there ever any time?
Simone Milasas 29:19
Do you know? No, I don’t actually go to doubt. What I go to is pushing myself too hard. And that’s what I need. That’s what I’ve been. I’ve been looking at that recently. I ended up in hospital three about three weeks ago because I had spasms in my back and yeah, I was like a big big you know, dramatic in the ambulance, you know, morphine codeine, the green whistle thing. I was like Jesus, so couldn’t move. But I got a CT scan, which was really great. So I got some information about what’s going on with my spine. And since then, I’ve been looking at different things that I’m choosing and one of them is what would it take to have that relaxation in my day? Because I am I mean, I was talking to my I’ve assistant yesterday I could if I wanted, I could fill my schedule up completely, you know, we’ve dealt with so many different things. And she’s so good at saying, Hey, I think you need some time off here, I think you need this, especially after you do a big gig. So, I am looking at that, because if I stop forcing and pushing myself, and allow myself to have space and relaxation, then what else is available. And in the past few weeks, this is a tool I’ve been using, because I’m very good at waking up in the morning and being really creative and sort of going, Okay, what am I going to do today, you know, can do this, this, this and this and this, and not from writing a list, just this, this mental list in my head of how many projects I’ve gotten, etc. This is not It sounds easy. But this has not been easy for me. I like a new muscle to stop. You know, as I’m making a coffee in the morning or something and go, Okay, I’m just going to destroy and uncreate every single thing that I think I have to do, what can I be today? Where is my energy required today. And it totally different days showing up for me and I have accomplished things that I wouldn’t have accomplished before. It’s really interesting and even, but really noticing, like, I’ve been pretty busy all morning today. And then, you know, after this podcast, I can perceive my body going, Hey, we need to just step away from the computer in the office and everything and go do something different, you know. And I’m really trying to listen to that, Debra. So I don’t think I go to the doubt of what I’m doing a more go to. I got to put the relaxation in. I got to put the relax, and take care of my body.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 31:35
So stop doing and start being Yeah, wise words. I must admit I was sitting there thinking in the morning, I’m I’m very much straight into oh my goodness, what needs to be done? And sometimes you just have to go for that be? Who Yeah, how can I be today? Yeah. Awesome. Okay, so I’m imagining because I’m sitting here, listen, some of the things that you don’t know. Yep. Yep, that sounds like me. stress and overwhelm. I know that I have to be very, very careful. Because I do push myself hard. I’m always on the go. And I’m always wanting to do more things. I’ve had to learn to get somebody else to say No, for me sometimes, because I’m not very good at saying no. But the stress and overwhelm. I know that for a lot of business owners, they feel that because they feel like there’s a whole lot of pressure on them and they’ve got to perform. What would you say to people who are feeling that way? How would you suggest they approach that?
Simone Milasas 32:24
Well, I think the first thing you need to look at is because we choose stress, overwhelm, anxiety, frustration, we choose all of those things. But what I would like you to ask is, Has that ever got you anywhere greater? Because when you get frustrated, and you go up, you know what the other day I was so frustrated and anxious and all of this, but you know, what ended up showing up is something so much better, it doesn’t, like we end up just going down this funnel and it gets smaller and smaller and smaller. So I don’t know where the hell we thought if I choose this, it’s going to create something greater, you know, you can track everything. So again, like a muscle. I’m not saying it’s easy, it sounds easy. But it’s like if when you come to those places, and whatever it is for you because it could be you know, like my Pilates instructor was saying to me, you know someone you say you’re not stressed because I’m not stressed like this, the most people would choose stress. But she said you she said look at your travel, look at yourself, your body and I went, you know what, you’re right. I’m not like I’m not stressed about money. I’m not stressed about you know, my work or something like that. But yeah, I put my I put my body through a lot of stress with how much I have been traveling, etc. So I’m asking what is my body require? So that’s my body. But for you, it could be money or business or relationships or anything asked, okay, so what? And this is a tool question, what space does this area of my life require? And if you like, let go of that anxiety and the frustration and grow what could I be if I wasn’t choosing the frustration? Because I think so many people try and define their life and define it and conclude it in order to create something greater, but it doesn’t work. You know, it’s like someone’s always saying, Oh, I’ve got you know, I know my ass is fat, right? And it’s like you keep judging it and judging and judging, you wake up in the morning and go down. It’s slimmed down overnight, because a judge did so much work like that. It’s like so what if you were grateful for the shape and size of your beautiful butt and then allowed the change to occur? Same thing with money, you know, your business, if you’ve got less clients or, you know, someone said to me the other day when people Zig I like to zag, and I went, That’s great. I’m gonna use that. Because at the moment, everyone’s like, Oh, my God, it’s you know, it’s recession. It’s this. It’s that I find what when they see us AG, you know,
Debra Chantry-Taylor 34:51
I think that’s so true. I talk a lot about the media over here in New Zealand is particularly appalling at making everything very, very negative doom and gloom. Obviously sells papers or whatever. I haven’t watched the news in over 12 years now, I think so I’ve got no idea what’s really going on in the world about in terms of that. But when you do, listen to people, it’s like, oh, but we’re in a recession. All of my clients have had the best year ever this year. And, yeah, sure, there might be some people who are suffering. I’m not saying that they’re not. But it is not the it’s not what the media makes it out to be. And I think you get to choose, as you said, you can take there’s always opportunity or always possibilities, always,
Simone Milasas 35:26
you know, I just had this visual when you said that about the newspapers. Can you imagine if a newspaper came out one day, and it just said, guys, we’re, it’s a happy day today. There’s no problems, we’re doing good, you know, and had these little high five or something that would be great.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 35:44
We actually, we always start our meetings with every positive thought for the day and how we how you’re feeling and good news for you know, professionally and personally. But also, I’m a big fan of high fives. Like I love high fives. I mean, they’re the best thing ever, right? Even for the small little wins is like, let’s have a high five on that. Well,
Simone Milasas 35:58
can I tell you, I learned this the other day, and I’m calling it my happiness movement, okay, because if you look at the energy, you’re putting your hand up together, right? And we’re high fiving, energy and hand up high fiving. Now, in anyone at home listening to this or watching this, it’s like if you have, if you go you’ve got a problem, right? And so most people would do this hunched in thing, and they’re like, ah, you know, or their hands on their head. And they’re like, Oh, I’ve got a money problem. I’ve got this and everything. So you talk about that, right? Now, I want you to think about the same thing and put your hands up in the air. So you’ve got a money problem. My system was so funny. The other day she was walking around the house going, I don’t have any problems. And I was like, I know. Because scientifically, the way the brain works in your hand, your arms up and open, it makes you have a look at none of that is real.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 36:56
Isn’t that that’s really fascinating. Okay, so yeah, I’m sure you have some amazing tips and tools for people around how they can actually shift their mindset and how they can actually embrace the world of possibilities as opposed to water problems. What would be your kind of top three tips or tools you would share?
Simone Milasas 37:12
I would say number one is don’t quit, like enjoy your choices. Don’t quit. Keep choosing no matter who says anything around you. Okay. You do. Number two is I’m going to ask what are you aware of? Because you are aware of so much more than you’re willing to acknowledge? So with something that you got when you go to say, Oh, I don’t know, stop, what am I aware of in regards to this? What am I aware of? And then the third thing I would I would suggest is stop judging you and your business or you in business. Most people have a judgment about them their business, or the judgment of them in business without enjoying it lacks.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 37:56
The joy of business. Yeah. I’ve heard you say quite a bit, you know, you do you and I think this is something that took me a long, long time to get my head around, because my parents had very strong ideas about who I should and shouldn’t be. And so I suppress a lot of me because that didn’t feel it was right. What happens if you don’t quite know who you are? What would you suggest people do to uncover to discover more about the, the beauty they have inside? And you said, Do you know, you probably don’t even know, you’re you could be learning all the time, aren’t we? And it’s being open to trying things, seeing what works for you? What makes you feel good? I don’t know. What do you do?
Simone Milasas 38:32
Absolutely. I don’t know. I do think that’s a key piece of it is trying something? Like, it’s like when you discover food, and it’s like, as a kid, you might go I don’t like that. I don’t like that. Have you tried it? You know, try it. And it’s like movement of the body. Try it a different way to be in business. Try it. What I do is I listen to so many things, or, you know, I sort of like listen to the whispers because you might hear something and you got all that. Let’s like, try it. You know, you might pick up a newspaper or a magazine or something and see something and go, Okay, I’ll try that. But if you expand your awareness out, like really expand your awareness out at least 100,000 kilometers, then you’ll start to pick up on the whispers of the universe and just saying, hey, what about this? What about this? And I’m gonna say be in question. One of the questions I would ask in the morning is two questions. Where is my energy required today? And who am I today? And what kind of glorious adventures Can I have? Because what if you could just destroy and uncreate all the definitions that you have, that you decided you were yesterday, and today? Today’s a new day. It’s a new day being questioned, don’t judge yourself. Keep choosing choose something different every day. See if it works for you.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 39:53
That’s really great advice. It’s interesting giggling to myself, because we actually were very fortunate to go to Bali for the first On this year, I had a conference over there that I was attending and I asked my husband if he’d like to come with me. He said, Oh, no, I don’t like barley. I went Okay, so that’s when you could go to Bali so I haven’t been I’ve said so how do you know you don’t like it is I just don’t think I would like it. I said, so. We don’t need research to sort of know what’s in Bali or have you got any kind of reasons why you think you might like it? No, I saw why he’s had a quick look around and see if something you might fancy doing and he’s like, Oh, I suppose I’ll come and he was also very very adamant he was not going to do whitewater rafting isn’t like water. And it’s like no, no, not gonna do it. So well. Let me just give it a try. What’s the worst that can happen kind of thing? He now raves about Bali, and the thing he enjoyed the most, the whitewater rafting.
Simone Milasas 40:41
I love it. I love talking about that’s awesome.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 40:46
Yeah. Yeah, you got to try things. I mean, I think my father he saw was that he had some really good questions he’s had to challenge me to say is, you know, what’s the worst that can happen? And how do you know if you don’t try? though? I may have taken a wee bit literally for his liking. But I’ve tried all sorts of things.
Simone Milasas 41:03
Oh, yes. That’s my father always used to say, Oh, my daughter, she’s so wild. I’m just trying it out. You know?
Debra Chantry-Taylor 41:11
You told me to do that’s right. Okay, cool. I would love for for people to be able to get in contact with you. So tell me a little bit about so what is the sort of work that you do? Now you work, obviously, with the Access Consciousness stuff? Is that with business leaders is that with individuals? How does that work?
Simone Milasas 41:27
I do a lot of seminars, and I do live seminars, but majority of stuff I do is live and online, I may do some, you know, telecoils classes that are just, you know, online as well. I’ve got a class coming up in December, that’s business done different. It’s online only. My name is a great name to Google because there is no other Simone Mila says that I have discovered in the world so far. My name Simone, Melissa’s, that’s where you can find my instagram handle, you know, Facebook, my website, like everything, and also on access consciousness.com. And it will list all the classes that I have coming up. I also do private sessions and you know, many different things.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 42:09
So yeah, perfect, thank you. And of course, the book, The Joy of business that can be found on Audible on Amazon, on all and in various different languages. And I haven’t read it, but I’m about to go get myself a copy because it sounds like it’s right up my alley in terms of I personally, I love business. I always have loved business. But it is interesting that working with a number of different business owners the different reasons we’ll go into business, and isn’t always about the joy.
Simone Milasas 42:33
Yeah, no. And yeah, and then you discover something different though. And for me, life was just full of discovery.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 42:41
Perfect. Hey, look, thank you so much for your time. I actually think that when i Next come over to Australia have to kind of catch catch up with you because I think we have a lot in common. We have a lot of fun together. But I appreciate everything that you’ve shared today. And yeah, thank you for joining us on the podcast.
Simone Milasas 42:54
Thank you so much for having me here. Debra.
Debra Chantry-Taylor 42:55
Pleasure.
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Debra Chantry-Taylor
Certified EOS Implementer | Entrepreneurial Leadership & Business Coach | Business Owner
#betterbusinessbetterlife #entrepreneur #leadership #eosimplementer #professionaleosimplementer #entrepreneurialbusinesscoach
Certified EOS Implementer New Zealand
Certified EOS Implementer Australia
Certified EOS Implementer UK
Certified EOS Implementer NZ
